Anne Bronte: The Tenant of Wildfell Hall

12. CHAPTER XII (continued)

I had not thus looked, and wished, and wondered long, before I vaulted over the barrier, unable to resist the temptation of taking one glance through the window, just to if she were more composed than when we parted; - and if I found her still in deep distress, perhaps I might venture attempt a word of comfort - to utter one of the many things I should have said before, instead of aggravating her sufferings by my stupid impetuosity. I looked. Her chair was vacant: so was the room. But at that moment some one opened the outer door, and a voice - her voice - said, - 'Come out - I want to see the moon, and breathe the evening air: they will do me good - if anything will.'

Here, then, were she and Rachel coming to take a walk in the garden. I wished myself safe back over the wall. I stood, however, in the shadow of the tall holly-bush, which, standing between the window and the porch, at present screened me from observation, but did not prevent me from seeing two figures come forth into the moonlight: Mrs. Graham followed by another - not Rachel, but a young man, slender and rather tall. O heavens, how my temples throbbed! Intense anxiety darkened my sight; but I thought - yes, and the voice confirmed it - it was Mr. Lawrence!

'You should not let it worry you so much, Helen,' said he; 'I will be more cautious in future; and in time - '

I did not hear the rest of the sentence; for he walked close beside her and spoke so gently that I could not catch the words. My heart was splitting with hatred; but I listened intently for her reply. I heard it plainly enough.

'But I must leave this place, Frederick,' she said - 'I never can be happy here, - nor anywhere else, indeed,' she added, with a mirthless laugh, - 'but I cannot rest here.'

'But where could you find a better place?' replied he, 'so secluded - so near me, if you think anything of that.'

'Yes,' interrupted she, 'it is all I could wish, if they could only have left me alone.'