Lewis Carroll: Through the Looking Glass

CHAPTER 3: Looking-Glass Insects (continued)

A Goat, that was sitting next to the gentleman in white, shut his eyes and said in a loud voice, `She ought to know her way to the ticket-office, even if she doesn't know her alphabet!'

There was a Beetle sitting next to the Goat (it was a very queer carriage-full of passengers altogether), and, as the rule seemed to be that they should all speak in turn, HE went on with `She'll have to go back from here as luggage!'

Alice couldn't see who was sitting beyond the Beetle, but a hoarse voice spoke next. `Change engines--' it said, and was obliged to leave off.

`It sounds like a horse,' Alice thought to herself. And an extremely small voice, close to her ear, said, `You might make a joke on that--something about "horse" and "hoarse," you know.'

Then a very gentle voice in the distance said, `She must be labelled "Lass, with care," you know--'

And after that other voices went on (What a number of people there are in the carriage!' thought Alice), saying, `She must go by post, as she's got a head on her--' `She must be sent as a message by the telegraph--' `She must draw the train herself the rest of the way--' and so on.

But the gentleman dressed in white paper leaned forwards and whispered in her ear, `Never mind what they all say, my dear, but take a return-ticket every time the train stops.'

`Indeed I shan't!' Alice said rather impatiently. `I don't belong to this railway journey at all--I was in a wood just now --and I wish I could get back there.'

`You might make a joke on THAT,' said the little voice close to her ear: `something about "you WOULD if you could," you know.'

`Don't tease so,' said Alice, looking about in vain to see where the voice came from; `if you're so anxious to have a joke made, why don't you make one yourself?'