Anthony Trollope: The Belton Estate

18. CHAPTER XVIII: MRS ASKERTON'S STORY (continued)

'What people?' said Clara, thinking as she spoke of the whole family at Aylmer Park.

'Your husband will tell you so.'

'I have no husband as yet to order me what to think or what not to think.'

'No not quite as yet. But you will tell him all this.'

'He knows it. It was he who told me.

'What! Captain Aylmer?'

'Yes; Captain Aylmer.'

'And what did he say?'

'Never mind. Captain Aylmer is not my husband not as yet. If he takes me, he must take me as I am, not as he might possibly have wished me to be. Lady Aylmer'

'And does Lady Aylmer know it?'

'Yes. Lady Aylmer is one of those hard, severe women who never forgive.'

'Ah, I see it all now. I understand it all. Clara, you must forget me, and come here no more. You shall not be ruined because you are generous.'

'Ruined! If Lady Aylmer's displeasure can ruin me, I must put up with ruin. I will not accept her for my guide. I am too old, and have had my own way too long. Do not let that thought trouble you. In this matter I shall judge for myself. I have judged for myself already.'

'And your father?'

'Papa knows nothing of it.'

'But you will tell him?'

'I do not know. Poor papa is very ill. If he were well I would tell him, and he would think as I do.'