William Shakespeare: The Comedy of Errors

ACT III. SCENE 2. The same. (continued)

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
Nell, sir; but her name and three-quarters, that is an ell and
three quarters, will not measure her from hip to hip.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Then she bears some breadth?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
No longer from head to foot than from hip to hip: she is
spherical, like a globe: I could find out countries in her.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
In what part of her body stands Ireland?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
Marry, sir, in her buttocks; I found it out by the bogs.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Where Scotland?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
I found it by the barrenness, hard in the palm of the hand.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Where France?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
In her forehead; armed and reverted, making war against her hair.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Where England?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
I looked for the chalky cliffs, but I could find no whiteness in
them; but I guess it stood in her chin, by the salt rheum that
ran between France and it.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Where Spain?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
Faith, I saw it not; but I felt it hot in her breath.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Where America,--the Indies?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE.
O, sir, upon her nose, an o'er embellished with rubies,
carbuncles, sapphires, declining their rich aspect to the hot
breath of Spain; who sent whole armadoes of carracks to be
ballast at her nose.

ANTIPHOLUS OF SYRACUSE.
Where stood Belgia,--the Netherlands?