Anthony Trollope: The Belton Estate

27. CHAPTER XXVII: ONCE MORE BACK TO BELTON (continued)

'But you should not be contented to be here. It is just that. In learning to love me or rather, perhaps, to pity me, you lower yourself. Do you think that I do not see it all, and know it all? Of course it is bad to be alone, but I have no right not to be alone.' There was nothing for Clara to do but to draw herself once again close to the poor woman, and to embrace her with protestations of fair, honest, equal regard and friendship. 'Do you think I do not understand that letter?' continued Mrs Askerton. 'If it had come from Lady Aylmer I could have laughed at it, because I believe Lady Aylmer to be an overbearing virago, whom it is good to put down in every way possible. But this comes from a pure-minded woman, one whom I believe to be little given to harsh judgments on her fellow-sinners; and she tells you, in her calm wise way, that it is bad for you to be here with me.'

'She says nothing of the kind.'

'But does she not mean it? Tell me honestly do you not know that she means it?'

'I am not to be guided by what she means.'

'But you are to be guided by what her brother means. It is to come to that, and you may as well bend your neck at once. It is to come to that, and the sooner the better for you. it is easy to see that you are badly off for guidance when you take up me as your friend.' When she had so spoken Mrs Askerton got up and went to the door. 'No, Clara, do not come with me; not now,' she said, turning to her companion, who had risen as though to follow her. 'I will come to you soon, but I would rather be alone now. And, look here, dear; you must answer your cousin's letter. Do so at once, and say that you will go to Plaistow. In any event it will be better for you.'