William Shakespeare: The Taming of the Shrew

ACT IV. 1. SCENE I. A hall in PETRUCHIO'S country house. (continued)

GRUMIO.
A cold world, Curtis, in every office but thine; and
therefore fire. Do thy duty, and have thy duty, for my master and
mistress are almost frozen to death.

CURTIS.
There's fire ready; and therefore, good Grumio, the news?

GRUMIO.
Why, 'Jack boy! ho, boy!' and as much news as thou wilt.

CURTIS.
Come, you are so full of cony-catching.

GRUMIO.
Why, therefore, fire; for I have caught extreme cold.
Where's the cook? Is supper ready, the house trimmed, rushes
strewed, cobwebs swept, the serving-men in their new fustian,
their white stockings, and every officer his wedding-garment on?
Be the Jacks fair within, the Jills fair without, and carpets
laid, and everything in order?

CURTIS.
All ready; and therefore, I pray thee, news?

GRUMIO.
First, know my horse is tired; my master and mistress fallen out.

CURTIS.
How?

GRUMIO.
Out of their saddles into the dirt; and thereby hangs a tale.

CURTIS.
Let's ha't, good Grumio.

GRUMIO.
Lend thine ear.

CURTIS.
Here.

GRUMIO.
[Striking him.] There.

CURTIS.
This 'tis to feel a tale, not to hear a tale.

GRUMIO.
And therefore 'tis called a sensible tale; and this cuff
was but to knock at your car and beseech listening. Now I begin:
Imprimis, we came down a foul hill, my master riding behind my
mistress,--

CURTIS.
Both of one horse?

GRUMIO.
What's that to thee?

CURTIS.
Why, a horse.