William Shakespeare: Much Ado About Nothing

ACT 5. 1. Scene I. Before LEONATO'S House. (continued)

DON PEDRO.
By this light, he changes more and more: I think he be angry
indeed.

CLAUDIO.
If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle.

BENEDICK.
Shall I speak a word in your ear?

CLAUDIO.
God bless me from a challenge!

BENEDICK.
[Aside to CLAUDIO.]
You are a villain, I jest not: I will make it good how you dare,
with what you dare, and when you dare. Do me right, or I will protest
your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall
fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you.

CLAUDIO.
Well I will meet you, so I may have good cheer.

DON PEDRO.
What, a feast, a feast?

CLAUDIO.
I' faith, I thank him; he hath bid me to a calf's-head and a capon,
the which if I do not carve most curiously, say my knife's naught.
Shall I not find a woodcock too?

BENEDICK.
Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily.

DON PEDRO.
I'll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the other day. I said,
thou hadst a fine wit. 'True,' says she, 'a fine little one.'
'No,' said I, 'a great wit.'
'Right,' said she, 'a great gross one.'
'Nay,' said I, 'a good wit.'
'Just,' said she, 'it hurts nobody.'
'Nay,' said I, 'the gentleman is wise.'
'Certain,' said she,a wise gentleman.'
'Nay,' said I, 'he hath the tongues.'
'That I believe' said she, 'for he swore a thing to me on Monday
night, which he forswore on Tuesday morning: there's a double tongue;
there's two tongues.'
Thus did she, an hour together, trans-shape thy particular virtues;
yet at last she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the properest man in
Italy.

CLAUDIO.
For the which she wept heartily and said she cared not.

DON PEDRO.
Yea, that she did; but yet, for all that, an if she did not hate him
deadly, she would love him dearly. The old man's daughter told us all.