Alexandre Dumas: The Count of Monte Cristo

Chapter 10: The King's Closet at the Tuileries. (continued)

"Here, sire?"

"l tell you to the left, and you are looking to the right; I mean on my left -- yes, there. You will find yesterday's report of the minister of police. But here is M. Dandre himself;" and M. Dandre, announced by the chamberlain-in-waiting, entered.

"Come in," said Louis XVIII., with repressed smile, "come in, Baron, and tell the duke all you know -- the latest news of M. de Bonaparte; do not conceal anything, however serious, -- let us see, the Island of Elba is a volcano, and we may expect to have issuing thence flaming and bristling war -- bella, horrida bella." M. Dandre leaned very respectfully on the back of a chair with his two hands, and said, --

"Has your majesty perused yesterday's report?"

"Yes, yes; but tell the duke himself, who cannot find anything, what the report contains -- give him the particulars of what the usurper is doing in his islet."

"Monsieur," said the baron to the duke, "all the servants of his majesty must approve of the latest intelligence which we have from the Island of Elba. Bonaparte" -- M. Dandre looked at Louis XVIII., who, employed in writing a note, did not even raise his head. "Bonaparte," continued the baron, "is mortally wearied, and passes whole days in watching his miners at work at Porto-Longone."

"And scratches himself for amusement," added the king.

"Scratches himself?" inquired the duke, "what does your majesty mean?"

"Yes, indeed, my dear duke. Did you forget that this great man, this hero, this demigod, is attacked with a malady of the skin which worries him to death, prurigo?"

"And, moreover, my dear duke," continued the minister of police, "we are almost assured that, in a very short time, the usurper will be insane."

"Insane?"