Honore de Balzac: Cousin Betty

1. PART I: THE PRODIGAL FATHER (continued)

"Make no remarks! I am leaving the house, and shall take Louise with me. You must stay here with monsieur; take good care of him----"

She went into her room, and wrote the following letter:--

"MONSIEUR LE COMTE,--

"The letter I enclose will sufficiently account for the determination I have come to.

"When you read this, I shall have left your house and have found refuge with my mother, taking our child with me.

"Do not imagine that I shall retrace my steps. Do not imagine that I am acting with the rash haste of youth, without reflection, with the anger of offended affection; you will be greatly mistaken.

"I have been thinking very deeply during the last fortnight of life, of love, of our marriage, of our duties to each other. I have known the perfect devotion of my mother; she has told me all her sorrows! She has been heroical--every day for twenty-three years. But I have not the strength to imitate her, not because I love you less than she loves my father, but for reasons of spirit and nature. Our home would be a hell; I might lose my head so far as to disgrace you--disgrace myself and our child.

"I refuse to be a Madame Marneffe; once launched on such a course, a woman of my temper might not, perhaps, be able to stop. I am, unfortunately for myself, a Hulot, not a Fischer.

"Alone, and absent from the scene of your dissipations, I am sure of myself, especially with my child to occupy me, and by the side of a strong and noble mother, whose life cannot fail to influence the vehement impetuousness of my feelings. There, I can be a good mother, bring our boy up well, and live. Under your roof the wife would oust the mother; and constant contention would sour my temper.